College

College: been there done that, didn’t care enough to buy the T-shirt and your tax dollars paid my way. Pell grants and other Federal and state financial assistance give young people all over America an opportunity and excuse to binge drink, have casual and meaningless sex, and experiment with drugs, run up credit card bills and other wise post-pone real life for an extra four or more years after high-school. All of this on Uncle Sam’s' bill I might add. As for the studious and enlightened ones that actually were sober enough to graduate, just go to Starbucks or Blockbuster and you will find them behind the counter in a uniform complete with a plastic corporate smile and nametag. Upon asking them how college prepared them for the real world, they will gleefully tell you about their degree that is framed and hanging above their bed in their parents house; Please rewind, it’s due back Monday before 10pm. Enjoy! As the tuition rises more and more each year the value of a degree decreases don’t buy the lie; a college degree is not a penance for salvation, or a ticket to the job of your dreams….why is it the government bends over backwards to emphasize the importance of college and to provide every means necessary to ensure the educations of America’s youth? Because a mind is a terrible thing to waste, knowledge is power, and federal and state funded institutions are the only place besides the media that the young, pliable, half-stoned minds of America’s future can be filled with ultra-left wing liberal socialistic propaganda. Not that I ‘m completely undermining the college experience, I do realize that it is often worth the years of debt and financial struggle that usually succeed it. However, there are other ways to obtain knowledge and to develop relationships rather than climb the ivory tower. For example, we live in the information age. If you want to know something about anything there is an immeasurable amount of info available on the internet. Granted you will have to wade thru some bull-shit to learn anything worth-while but then again college is not bull-shit free by any means either. Better yet read a book. As far as social life goes, there are other ways to meet people besides paying thousands of dollars of tuition fees for the college community life, join a cult. They are a hell of a lot more accepting than a fraternity or sorority would be and the initiation process promises to be a lot less weird and humiliating. Or, if the cult thing is not for you, try a motorcycle gang, bridge club, internet dating service, become a barfly at a local dive, or get a job. The best professor is life and the best education is experience; live. If you want to learn about aboriginals in Australia, get out of the classroom and fly there and develop a taste for kangaroo burgers I guarantee you will learn much more for a much cheaper price.