Literary/Verbal Dichotomy.

 Observing the stark contrast between my literary compositions and my verbal vernacular, I see a vast chasm between scholarly eloquence and gross etymological abuses...My writing reads as if it should be inspected in specticals and spoken in Old English...contrarily my actual grammar is mostly pigeon/ebonics in a southern accent with an over-use of the word "Fuck" and various conjugations of it...I think I may be Bi-polar.